I’ve decided to give myself a break as a mom.
I’m done beating myself up for all the stuff I’m NOT doing, or not doing well. I’m done putting expectations on myself that don’t need to be there. I’ve decided to give myself a break, because I need one. And I’m pretty sure you need one too.
Recently my husband preached a sermon at church (and rocked it, by the way). He talked about backpackers who start hiking the Appalachian Trail, and they end up throwing off all kinds of gear in the first several miles of the hike.
Why? Because it’s weighing them down. There’s nothing wrong with the gear – in fact, much of it is brand new. But it turns out, that gear wasn’t absolutely necessary for the hike. It wasn’t required, and it was actually slowing them down.
Isn’t that how life is sometimes as moms? We carry around all this extra STUFF that is actually not necessary at all, and in fact, it often slows us down or steals our joy.
One weight that I have carried around is perfectionism – attempting to the be the “perfect” mom.
My desire to plan everything and have things go just the way I planned has gotten in the way of enjoying some aspects of motherhood.
CLICK HERE to read about how I’m like Lord Business as a mom over at Oh, Honestly!
My need for order and organization, while living with a child who is the complete opposite, has created challenges for me and for her. I’m gradually learning to give myself a break, and recognize that I am NEVER going to be a perfect mom, so there’s really no point in having that as a goal.
Maybe perfectionism is not the weight that you carry around.
Maybe it’s wanting to give your kids every opportunity so that they have a great childhood.
So you spend every waking minute running around to the sports teams, art classes, horseback riding lessons, and piano recitals. There’s nothing wrong with any of those activities – but are they weighing you down?
Are you finding yourself stressed just thinking about your overcrowded schedule? If so, it’s time to give yourself a break.
Or perhaps it’s the pressure to work, or to stay at home, or to do some combination of the two.
Is your career, or lack thereof, causing you to feel “less-than” as a mom? Are you weighing yourself down by worrying about how these decisions are going to affect your child 15 years down the road? STOP. Just stop.
Maybe you’re a Pastor’s wife like me, and you feel the need to do everything.
There’s a ministry that needs help at church, so you’re the point person. You step in because you think no one else is going to do it. You pour so much into church that you feel completely drained at home with your family.
IT’S TIME TO GIVE OURSELVES A BREAK, MOMMAS.
It’s time to throw off these extra weights – even the good ones – and just chill out. This is not easy for me to say. I’m not the most “chill” person you’ll ever meet.
But I have to admit, life is a lot more fun when you’re not trying to be everything to everyone.
[bctt tweet=”Life is a lot more fun when you’re not trying to be everything to everyone.”]
- Life is more fun…
- when you stop worrying about impressing people you barely know, and instead focus on caring for yourself and those closest to you.
- when you stop being concerned about doing it all, and instead just do your best where you are planted right now.
- when you stop comparing yourself to all the other moms who are doing their thing, and instead just focus on doing YOUR thing.
Yup, it is time to give myself a break as a mom, and I hope you do it, too.
It is so easy to be overwhelmed by life and caught up in things that really don’t matter. I try to audit our schedule as often as possible and cut out things that aren’t providing our family real value. It’s still not easy when you are raising 5 kids and want all of them to have the chance to try things that matter to their own little personality!
So true, Jamie! I am sure it is extra challenging the more kids you have, and you want them to do somethings they enjoy. I think that constant evaluation is a good idea, just to make sure you’re not having unnecessary stress.
Well said! Us parents, not the kids, create the pressure / stress. Between all the extra-curricular activities, reading sessions, etc. We’re exhausted and I’m pretty sure our kids are too!
Yes, good point! Most of the time, our kids are content just to be with their family (at least in the younger years). I’m committed to not over-committing 🙂
So very true. Thanks for writing this. I often say that I can do everything, just not all at the same time. We definitely try not to over-commit, we all get a bit cranky when we don’t have enough time at home to just relax, play and be ourselves. I’ve learned to say “no thank you” or “not right now” pretty well.
You are TOTALLY speaking to me! I found you at OH HONESTLY and LOVE your perspective!
Kristen, thanks so much for stopping by and commenting! I am so glad this post encouraged you.