Have you ever felt like your past disqualifies you from stepping into a leadership role? Do you ever appear confident to others but truly struggle with feeling that way?

Overcoming Guilt and Shame and Becoming a Confident Leader

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In this episode, Holly and I talk with our guest Chelsey DeMatteis about her leadership journey and how she has overcome guilt and shame about her past and stepped into leadership. She shares some of the ways God used others to help her heal and how she’s gradually grown in her leadership roles. Chelsey also provides insights into why different generations of women need one another and how we can effectively reach out to other women.

In addition, Chelsey shares that while she previously appeared as though she was very confident, she actually struggled on the inside. We discuss how God has shifted the way she perceives confidence and helped her to grow into this new perspective.

This episode is brought to you by the Confident Leader Catalyst. Click here to get on the waitlist or learn more. When you get on the waitlist, I’ll also send you my free “Renew Your Mind” guide with 12 Biblical mindset shifts you need to make to become a confident leader.


Key Points Discussed:

  • Chelsey’s life & leadership [4:00]
  • The shame and guilt Chelsey experienced and how she healed [8:41]
  • Learning to use her gifts [15:36]
  • Why different generations need one another [19:15]
  • Impact of mentors in Chelsey’s leadership [24:31]
  • Chelsey’s struggle with confidence [29:43]
  • Refining her personality and gifts [33:12]
  • Transitioning from working to staying at home [39:10]
  • How Chelsey’s podcast came to be [42:26]
  • Dealing with comparison [48:18]
  • Leaders are learners [55:25]


Key Quotes:

  • “It’s okay to want to lead. You have to be willing to be led, but it’s okay to live that out.”
  • “These older women saw value in inviting a younger woman to the table because I was rooted in God’s unchanging truth, but I had fresh perspective generationally.” 
  • “Get on their level and be eye to eye with them because that’s how you are going to learn to love them in the way they need to be loved.” 
  • “How do I blend the things I’m good at with what God wants me to do with them?” 
  • “My confidence has to be fully set in Him.”
  • “You cannot lead if you are not willing to be led by others that God puts over you in authority.” 


Resources & Links:


Connect with Chelsey:

Chelsey is a wife, SAHM to her sweet almost 3 year old, in the sweetest little suburb outside Columbus, OH. She hosts the weekly aired Living With Less podcast and is a  devotional writer for iBelieve.com, Crosswalk.com, and Exhale Women. 

Her hearts greatest desire is to live life with a John 3:30 perspective, “He must increase, but I must decrease.” In doing so The Lord has been walking her through a beautifully challenging season to learn what this truly looks like, and as a bonus allowed her to invite others to join along for the ride. 

Chelsey loves her local church and serving in women’s and middle school girls ministry. But the greatest ministry she loves to watch unfold is the one that happens in her heart and in her home with her family. 

Take the next Step:

This episode is brought to you by the Confident Leader Catalyst. Click here to get on the waitlist or learn more. You can also find the free Confident Leader Stages Quiz here.


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