Here’s part 4 of the 13 Powerful Questions to Ask for a Marriage that Lasts series!
Communication is the biggest challenge that my husband and have in our marriage. We have to really work at communicating effectively in order to understand one another. Effective communication is a big key to having a marriage that lasts. That’s why these last 3 questions of our series are so valuable to me.
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- Am I showing proper respect to my spouse?
Do you know what the number one need for men is? You guessed it – respect!
As a newly marrried gal, this took me a while to learn and understand. I didn’t always have much respect for men, based on some previous experiences – but this wasn’t my husband’s fault. I eventually learned that respecting my husband did not mean agreeing with everything he said. What it does mean is encouraging my husband’s ideas, dreams, and goals. It means never speaking negatively about him in public. It means supporting him, even if I don’t always agree with him.
Do I do this perfectly? Absolutely not. But I have learned that respecting my husband goes a long way in helping us to have a marriage that lasts.
- Do I listen attentively when my spouse is talking to me?
While respecting my husband is super important to him, being heard is super important to me – and most women. With the prevalence of multitasking, smart phones, and busy schedules, often I find that our conversations are disjointed and neither of us are fully engaged and listening. But taking time to be sure and actively listen to my husband, and vice versa, is so key to healthy communication.
- Do I make time to have a quiet time with God daily?
If you are not a Christian, this question may not make a lot of sense to you. If that’s the case, I would say you can re-phrase the question to fit your belief. For example, you might ask, “Do I make time to reflect each day?”
However, if you are a Christian, as I am, then this question is of ultimate importance. Even more than the previous 12. Because, let’s be honest, this marriage thing is hard.
The times that I feel incredibly frustrated, discouraged, or angry with my spouse are often the times when I have not been making my daily quiet time with God a priority.
When I do put God first in my day and in my life, it is much easier for me to admit I’m wrong, to put my husband’s needs before my own, and to respect him. So if you find yourself off track, it may be time to re-assess your day and make sure you are including some time to reflect, pray, and read God’s word. You’ll be amazed at how much this can help improve your marriage and your attitude toward your spouse.
13 POWERFUL QUESTIONS FOR A MARRIAGE THAT LASTS: PART 4
Marriage Tip: Listen More Than You Speak
The saying “God gave you 2 ears and 1 mouth for a reason” sums up these last 3 questions very well. Take time to truly hear your spouse – every day. Take time to listen to God – every day. If you truly want to have a marriage that lasts, you’ve got to be willing to be quiet!
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